Once upon a time there lived an old evil turtle. The turtle hadn’t always been evil, but as he got older he became a mean and bitter turtle.
He especially hated children with all their running and playing and laughing. He was too old for such activities. How dare the kids have fun. So the turtle decided to bite a child. He had one good bite left in him, and he swore he would use it before he died. Unfortunately, the turtle was too slow. He couldn’t catch the kids. Any kid.
When the children realized the turtle was trying to bite them but was too slow, they had fun dodging and mocking him. That enraged the reptile, and his hate grew as he got older and slower. He was almost 130 years old now. Turtles live a long time.
The turtle was desperate to bite someone so he changed his tactics. He pretended to love children in hopes that one would let down his guard. The kids didn’t trust the turtle.
“We’re not stupid,” they said.
The years passed. The children moved away. Then one day, four adventurous brothers moved into the neighborhood. Their names in order of age were Noah, the youngest, then Andrew, Damien and Xavier, the oldest. The brothers weren’t aware of the turtle’s reputation for nastiness. The turtle was the nicest turtle ever.
‘Aha,’ the turtle thought, ‘my opportunity has arrived.’ He offered the boys a ride on his back. ‘Just get close. Just get close,’ he eagerly thought. The boys accepted the ride, and they rode the turtle and rode him and rode him some more.
But the turtle was unable to deliver the long-anticipated bite. His neck was too short to reach around his shell, and the boys stayed away from his mouth.
The turtle could bear it no more. He cried tears of pent-up bitterness. He cried and cried and cried some more. This alarmed the boys, who tried to comfort the old reptile.
“What’s wrong?” Xavier asked. The brothers were seriously concerned.
And so it was that the turtle tried an as-yet-untried tactic. He told the truth. The turtle told the boys of his long-held dream to bite a child. Children would not cooperate, he complained. He confided that he feared dying having never achieved his dream. He just couldn’t bear the thought of that, he sniffled.
“You can bite me,” Damien offered. Andrew and Noah offered their arms to the turtle. For the first time in a long time, the old turtle felt happiness. It had been so easy to lure the children into his trap. There in front of him were four kid arms. He opened his salivating beak and lurched at the boys aiming to lock his jaws on an arm, any arm, before they changed their minds.
SNAP, came down his powerful jaws. The earth shook with the ferocity of the bite. But there was no flesh there. The boys had dodged the bite. They stood inches from the turtle just out of biting range.
“But wh-wh-why?” the distressed turtle stammered.
“We’re not stupid,” said the boys.
Moral:Beware the bite of the old who begrudge the young their fun.
